Chapter One

written by A Vagina

Maheu gazed over the choked, filthy landscape that her people once called home. That was before the year 2352, when the Cause declared moral victory in its war against the othersexuals and claimed for its Believers all of earth’s landmasses except Greenland, a once–barely habitable icy expanse. Outsiders derisively called the outpost Alphabet City, referring to the giant acronym the othersexuals had adopted in their quest for inclusiveness. But against all odds, the LGBTQIRA—or lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning, intersex, (self) replicating, and asexual cooperative—had created something close to paradise in their new home. Despite its origins as a refuge for those considered different, New Greenland celebrated the heterosexual offspring of generations of alternative families, such that by the 26th century, the tiny nation sported an even mix of what were once deemed traditional and nontraditional families—though children raised within its boundaries understood no such distinction. 

But not all was well in the 26th century. In 2552, marking its bicentennial of moral cleansing, the Cause threatened war on the LGBTQIRA yet again, and for just one reason: land—for not only had that discarded landmass become enviably improved in the DIY hands of the othersexuals, its sheer surface area had become critical in the Cause’s scramble to house unfettered population growth. While the Cause continued to exile its incurable othersexuals to New Greenland, such offspring represented only a tiny fraction of the baby boom that ensued when abortion was made a crime punishable by death. Subsequent laws had been passed in increasingly desperate efforts to stanch the overflow—premarital and drunken sex were now capital offenses; and to boost exile rates, the legal definition of “othersexual” was expanded to include infertile heterosexuals as well as those caught in acts of sodomy, masturbation, and other extra-procreation “perversions.” And still the population suffocated under its own weight. New Greenland, however comparatively tiny, was marketed to the Believers as the next great frontier. To prepare the way for resettlement, the Cause trumpeted yet another exile of the othersexuals—this time planetary. 

It was in this time of crisis that Maheu took leave of the idyllic life she shared with her partner, Whittington, in suburban New Greenland, journeying to the dystopic territory that had once been the United States of America, now seat of the Cause’s theocracy. Representing the LGBTQIRA, Maheu was to meet with the man known only as Lima, the supreme leader of the Cause. It was an ancestor of Lima’s, Prophet Bean, who founded the Cause after declaring himself God’s representative on earth, inspiring both reverence and fear among a people who now held up as absolutes the dynasty’s claims to omniscience and omnipotence.  

And so it was up to Maheu to somehow expose the Bean family, and thus the Cause, as a sham to the vast army of Believers, for it was only through attrition that the worldwide hegemony could be brought to an end. She had come to settle a 200-year-old battle against an enemy claiming 98% of the world’s population, 100% of its weaponry, and an overwhelming level of power amassed as a result. But Maheu had a secret power —one with which she knew she could best Lima if he would just meet her on a fair playing field. Maheu, you see, was an excellent speller. As such, she had come to this dystopian land to challenge Lima to a Scrabble tournament, and she knew the tiles were stacked against her, but she was ready to win—or die trying.

(Suzanne: Congratulations on finding Chapter 1. To unlock Chapter 2, you must post this to the address given to you. Once this chapter is posted, Chapter 2 will be unlocked the next day.)